12 "Rules" for "Turning Your Child into a Crook"
by Rev. Talbot Dilworth-Harrison
as listed in his Chesterfield, England, church bulletin.
- Begin from infancy to give the child everything he wants. This way he will grow up to believe that the world owes him a living.
- When he picks up bad words, laugh at him. It will encourage him to pick up "cutter" phrases that will blow the top off your head later.
- Never give him any spiritual training. Wait until he is 21 and then let him decide for himself.
- Avoid the use of the word "wrong." It may develop a guilt complex. This will condition him to
believe later when he is arrested for stealing a car that society is against him and he is being persecuted.
- Pick up anything he leaves lying around – books, shoes, clothing. Do everything for him so he will be experienced in throwing the responsibility onto others.
- Let him read any printed matter he can get his hands on. Be careful the silverware and drinking glasses are sterilized, but let his mind feed on garbage.
- Quarrel frequently in the presence of the children. Then they won't be too shocked when the home is broken up.
- Give the child all the spending money he wants. Never let him earn his own. Why should he have things as tough as you had them?
- Satisfy his every craving for food, drink and comfort. See that every desire is gratified. Denial may lead to harmful frustrations.
- Take his part against the neighbors, teachers and policemen. They are all prejudiced against your child.
- When he gets into real trouble, apologize for yourself by saying, "I never could do anything with him."
- Prepare for a life of grief – you will have it.